Researching Childhood Friends

My daughter, Rebecca, is putting together a book for my birthday with photos from my life.  She sent me this photo asking , "who are these children with you (back row left) and Jane (front row right)?"  And thus began several days of Jane and I reminiscing about childhood friends when we lived in Tower Grove South neighborhood.  And that led us to "whatever became of them"?  Jane and I both have great researching skills so we went to work.

First, was Barbara E. whose family had pretty much adopted my grandmother, mother and us as one of their own.  I knew all of Barbara's aunts and grandparents had died, but what happened to Barbara.  I researched her name on ancestry, but nothing but her high school year book photo and a marriage certificate came up (was she REALLY married at 18?).  So, I googled her husband who had a Facebook Account.  I messaged him and he wrote me right back that he and Barbara were divorced, she had re-married and was living in Pacific Northwest, but he had lost touch with her.

Next were this family who shared a "flat" with us.  We lived upstairs and they lived downstairs.  The girl in the middle "D" was older and was always a bit aloof.  Researching her, I found she had been living in Belleville IL but has died.  Jane and I had known that "W", the beautiful red-headed boy had died young.  He had become a hair dresser and was gay.  Jane thought suicide but I thought AIDs.  Neither of us was right---an automobile accident in Illinois that also killed the man who was with him.  Next was "La Wanda", his twin sister who is sitting in front of me and beside Jane.

She and her brother were in the same grade as I was but went to the Catholic school.  She was quiet but friendly and smiled more than this photo shows.  They had a difficult home life as many children did in that neighborhood with parents who drank too much being the common thread.  Although we enjoyed playing with the twins, I don't recall ever playing in each other's flat---just in the yard or on the sidewalk.  Thanks to their father's obituary, I was able to find "LaWanda's" married name.  With that, Jane was able to locate an address in Missouri.  I have tried to contact her on Facebook, but she hasn't responded.  Maybe she doesn't remember us, maybe she does and doesn't want to be re-acquainted, maybe she hasn't received the message.

I have her address and could write her a note, but I don't know if I want to.  There's something so "safe" about Facebook.  It's a great place to catch up on old friendships---no one really knows your e-mail, phone or address.  If you decide this is not a friendship worth having, you can unfriend, unfollow or "snooze".  It's as if you never reached out.  You can't do that with the other means of communication.  (Although I have delegated one friend as "junk mail" after unfriending him on Facebook)

I am grateful that I have my sister Jane to share memories with.  We both have amazing research skills (mine through my genealogy and hers through her job in the insurance business).  This exploration of these two families, brought us together on-line working toward a common goal despite not having seen each other since early March.  There are still a few families we haven't tracked down yet---hey, Jane how about the Ernsts and the Shorts?