Winter Solstice

Candle light

Twinkle lights

Fire light

Street lights

Moon light

All bring hope, promise,

And direction in the dark.

Without the darkness,
During the day,
Those lights are dimmed--
Seldom seen
Rarely followed.

I’m not afraid of the dark
With those dots of light

Always coaxing me on.
I celebrate the dark and light,
Walking hand in hand.

He is the light that keeps me

Moving forward on our darkest day,

In the dark days of life.
Walking . . .his hand in my hand,
Urging me on.

Trees

Last night at Writer's Life, a group at our church, John shared a story about a special tree in his yard which had me thinking about some of my trees---especially the redbud and dogwood trees.  I have spent good money buying redbud and dogwood trees even though they are native to Missouri.  I have been lured by the the red leaves and pink blossoms of the cultivated trees, but those trees died.

I, now have a yard full of dogwoods and redbuds which I never planted---they are "God-planted" trees with the help of squirrels and birds.  One of the dogwoods, in my front is only about 36" from where I planted one of my store-bought trees.  Another dogwood is right outside our sunroom and is  framed by Dave's window.  It forms a beautiful screen between us and our neighbor.  My last dogwood, I call "bonsai"---it is way too close to our house (under the eaves) and drive-way, but I love seeing it there, so I keep cutting it back.

We have always had a redbud on our backyard berm---our current one was so overshadowed by the older one that it has a permanent lean.  And then, I have another very close to the house which the birds love to sit in near the bird feeders, but it is too weak to bear the weight of a squirrel.

The rest of the dogwoods and redbuds are in a wooded area at the back of our lot growing naturally under the canopy of the larger locust, sweet gum and oak trees.  It's interesting that the trees I love are all "wild" trees growing where God planted them---with the help of squirrels and birds.  They aren't where I thought they should be but where they grow naturally---near the house and under the larger trees.  Some trees just need the company  and protection of others---that's where they gain strength to let their beauty shine.  We can't all be strong oak trees or perpetually active pine trees; some of us need help and protection.  If it's all part of God's plan for trees, then maybe it is part of God's plan for us too.  Those of us who are strong and independent, need to recognize that others may need our shelter and protection in  order to grow and flourish.

I believe

I believe

in angels who watch over me,

in the holy spirit which guides me,

in the DNA of my ancestors influencing who I am,

in inspiration which comes unannounced.

I BELIEVE

I believe 

in education and health care for all,

in freedom to live with whom and where I want to live,

in discussion not angry words with name-calling and threats,

in families focusing on what they have in common not what keeps them apart,

I BELIEVE in PEACE.

I believe

in clean air, water and soil as God intended,

in saving threatened species which God has created,

in supporting other energy sources other than fossil fuels,

in recycling, composting, re-purposing.

I BELIEVE in the EARTH.

I believe 

in respecting other religious groups,

in welcoming immigrants and refugees,

in being open and willing to learn from those who are different,

in seeing the good in people even if I have to search for it.

I BELIEVE in PEACE on EARTH.

Photo by Perry Grone on Unsplash

I believe. .. .

Galatians 5:1 It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

Our pastor challenged us to write an "I believe" statement.  I had a hard time because the Frankie Laine song kept going through my head.  Click here  So, I had to think of way to get there through a "back door".  I recalled the Schwends always quoting Bitsy, "Everything's going to be all right" and I thought, "What phrases do I use all of the time?"  That might help me find my core beliefs.

There are two phrases I find myself repeating. One is, “Go while the gettin’ is good.” Thank goodness, Dave and I have always made quality travel experiences a priority since at this time, our health prevents us from traveling much.  Someone was surprised that I had already achieved 100 things on my “bucket list” but we travelled, skied, hiked, biked when we were young and healthy.  We might not have always lived in the largest house or driven the fanciest cars, but we chose to experience life to its fullest while we could. We loved to travel and hope to again some day.

My other frequently used phrase  is “ Life is too short for uncomfortable shoes.”  This probably began when I was in 8th grade.  I was always short, but suddenly I felt . . . .well, immature compared to my classmates.  So I went out and bought a pair of high heel shoes.  Yes, they were uncomfortable, but they made me look more mature.. . . or so I thought until I saw a reflection in a store window of myself walking.  I looked like a little girl clomping around in her mother’s high heels.  Then, I did the math.  I was 5’ tall and 3” heels made me 5’3” which was not exactly statuesque.  That was the last time I ever wore high heels.

I wore hush puppies, Dr. Scholl’s, Birkenstocks, Clarks and Merrills——insisting that there was more to life than fashionable and uncomfortable shoes.  I also took that credo to other aspects of my life.  I drive a VW Beetle which makes me smile and fits me just right. My kitchen island is shorter than counter tops so I can work comfortably. I seldom wear skirts or dresses which bind me at the waist.  I don’t watch television which makes me squirm with its language or violence.  I shut off all political diatribes on facebook by “hiding” them or blocking the original poster.  

But, lately I’ve noticed that I’ve started avoiding people and groups which make me uncomfortable, also. It probably began when I had to limit my social contact due to being immune suppressed. Also, I’ve had blood pressure issues for years.   I see a doctor regularly, but. . . .when I’m with pessimistic people, toxic people, or angry people, my blood pressure rises. Whether it’s their politics, their slant on Christianity,  or their values, I just haven’t be able to make room in my life for people who are binding and make me squirm.  If I have to limit my social contact, then I want it to be with healthy people in every aspect. So, I’ve expanded my “Life is too short for uncomfortable shoes” to “Life is too short to surround myself with people who make me uncomfortable.”  

Which bring me to my “I believe “statement. . . . I believe in freedom from things, people, places that bind me.  I believe in freedom to choose where I live, how I live, with whom I live. My DNA says that I descend from a slave in America, and now I wonder if my need for freedom and travel comes from something imbedded in my DNA. But, maybe by “choosing my social contacts” I am in truth restricting myself to just people who are like myself.  Maybe I need to break out of my “comfort zone” in order to be truly free of chains. Maybe, as my daughter suggested, those whom I see as negative or shallow, need encouragement to break their chains also.

Psalm 107:13-16 - Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress. He brought them out of darkness, the utter darkness, and broke away their chains. Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind, for he breaks down gates of bronze and cuts through bars of iron.

A New Orleans Angel

We were arriving in New Orleans in the rain after a Caribbean cruise . I always feel anxious disembarking from the cruise.  It's not so much leaving a pampered life style behind as it is being in long lines of grumpy people who are worried about their flights home, finding their luggage, getting someone to help them get the luggage to the curb or they just need another cup of coffee.  I have more anxiety than most because I feel like it is all up to me---getting the luggage and managing my husband Dave in a wheel chair, navigating the whole process.

I had left Dave in a wheel chair on the curb with our  small travel umbrella and our luggage, as I scampered over the railroad tracks to get our van on the cruise parking lot in a light rain.  I had a pretty good idea where our car was, having spotted our silver mini-van from the cruise ship and taken a photo—wow, was I wrong.  I wandered up and down the aisles searching for our van getting wetter.  My anxiety was building as I thought of Dave just sitting there in the rain with our luggage AND I had at least a 30 minute drive from the parking lot to where he was since the street was one-way in a giant loop with lots of traffic and stop lights.  

I started praying, “Please, God, help me find our van” as I continued searching up and down the endless aisles.  After a few minutes an elderly man in a golf cart approached and asked, "Do you need help."  I started crying, “I can’t find our van my husband is in a wheel chair on the curb getting wet and it’s going to take me at least 30 minutes to get him because I can’t wheel him over the railroad tracks.”  “Ma’am, let’s first find your van and then we’ll get your husband.”  

We found the van which wasn’t even close to the area I was searching in.  Then, he said, “Let’s go get your husband.”  He took us over the tracks, loaded the luggage, Dave, and the wheelchair into the cart and took us back to the van.  He put the suitcases and wheel chair in the van while I helped Dave get in. I could feel that weight of anxiety slowly slipping away.

Before he left, I tipped my rescuer $20 and said, “Thank you for  rescuing me—you are like an angel answering my prayers.” He looked at me with tears and said with a catch in his voice, “That means more to me than the tip.  Thank you.”  I often tell people, “my guardian angel is an elderly man in New Orlean riding on a golf cart." I try to remember that moment anytime I feel weighted down with anxieties and worries.  If God could send that man to rescue us in New Orleans, he will be there for this crisis too.